Sharing my first Vipassana experience for those who want to know what really goes on at one of these retreats. I’ve been asked so many questions like how you can survive on a silent retreat for 10 days and not go crazy….is it as hard as it sounds? How can you be off your phone and out of touch with society for so long?

In many ways, it’s a lot easier than you think! Like being disconnected from the world for 10 days, and practicing noble silence (no talking, no eye contact or facial interaction with anyone on the retreat) can seem a bit absurd. A lot of people wonder: How do you deal with the boredom? All the thoughts in your head? All the time on your hands? What’s the schedule like? Do you really wake up at 4:30 a.m. and meditate for 10 hours a day?

Yup you do;) But it’s different than you think. Firstly, giving up your phone and being disconnected from society, felt super easy. That wasn’t challenging at all. Not talking to anyone, well you get used to it, you’re all in it together. But the mind work is what no one warns you about, and that is not easy! But it’s so worth it when you see what you get out of it.

And the accommodations, wow! I can write a whole article just on that!!!

Actually, let me start there, and cushion this up with some lovely details that will make you more curious (maybe even interested) in this wonderful FREE retreat, that is run completely by volunteers who benefited from this in the past and want to give back so others can experience the liberation, the calm, the peace, and the transformation that they experienced.

Btw, I know this article is super long…if you don’t need all the details, skim thru it to what you find most intriguing and check out the Photos below. I hope I can convince you to attend one of these soon. It’ll be the best gift you can give yourself. Better than the best vacation.

I attended my first 10-day Vipassana experience in March 2024 in Kauffman, TX. I chose this location because it came up as 1 of the 3 nicest locations in the US with private accommodations (your own room and bathroom) which you can see in the picture below is small and modest but has everything you need. They even have supply closets filled with toiletries, towels, linen in case you forgot, and tons of extra soap, bug spray, slippers, etc.

Nothing is missing here physically. You have everything you need for the most comfortable, enjoyable stay and the FOOD was incredible! They use mindful ingredients, serve a delicious vegetarian menu, and yes, only one big meal a day. A small breakfast at 6:30am, a large lunch at 11am, and fruit and tea at 5pm, for new students. Returning students are encouraged to only drink liquids after lunch and not consume food. They made us a warm pot of ginger tea which was perfect. I was a new student but opted for no food after lunch (and usually I skipped breakfast too) cuz I wanted to enhance my meditation, sleep and overall experience.

Personally, I have practiced intermittent fasting, so not eating after 11:45am felt super easy, especially in this setting. Think about this: half the time we eat it’s because it’s “time” to eat, or others are eating, or we’re bored, stressed, overwhelmed, worried, on vacation, on a plane, at a party, having fun, or out with friends. How many times are you actually hungry when you turn to food? My guess is probably not very often, unless you’re already practicing mindfulness around food. Most of my clients are emotional eaters. I am one too. I also know people who attended this program to help them with some kind of addiction whether it was food, alcohol, or workaholism. Some lost weight for the first time in their lives easily after the retreat, after struggling with a long history of dieting. Some gave up alcohol for good. Some learned to have a more balanced life and spend less time in the office and more time with family. Some who worshipped money and physical things were able to transform that and be happier with what they had.

I had on my eyes on this retreat for 5 years after a few friends attended and shared with me the transformations it has given them. My friend C shared how she became much less reactive to her surroundings, ie: no more road rage, or getting bent out of shape with stresses at work or losing patience with her kids.

How does 10 days of silence transform so much?

Well, it’s not just ten days of silence; there’s a whole schedule and a very thought-out nuanced program. And a lot of mind work that you’ll be doing too to retrain your mind to think in a different way than it has ever thought since birth. When you’re born, you’re wired to be reactive, or to create a reaction to get your needs met, right? A baby cries when they’re hungry or when they need a diaper change. That’s normal and age appropriate, but it’s not healthy to carry reactions in the same way into adulthood. Sadly, many people do, which causes a lot of distress in the body and in our human life. Ie: If you’re upset cuz someone wronged you in some way, while your feelings may be totally legit and valid…the more you dwell on it, the more you aggravate yourself. Perhaps your plane gets delayed and you miss your best friend’s wedding, yeh, it sucks. But what sucks more is how bent out of shape this made you and took over all your thoughts and emotions throughout the day.

Key points that we learned on day one and delved into more each day:

1. Nothing is permanent – pleasure and pain come in our life and then pass. But we have a wild, crazy mind that will do anything to focus on past or future and on pleasure and pain. We delve into it over and over. We reminisce about the good stuff and wonder how we can create more of that. Then overanalyze the bad things that have happened to us and strategize on how we can avoid that in the future. If you actually stop to analyze your thoughts, you’ll realize that your mind does everything and anything to get you away from the present. It loves harping on the past and planning for the future. This is misplaced attachment that doesn’t serve you. The past is gone, and the future didn’t happen yet, but the present is quickly passing – and if you’re not living there, you’re not living.
2. The misery that comes into the human life, is not so much what happens to us but how we react to it. If we can learn to observe the challenges and the pleasures of life without getting attached to the pain or enjoyment, and realize that everything comes and goes and nothing is permanent, we can then go thru life with much more ease.
3. There is no magic pill to the perfect life. Every single human is solely responsible to get themselves out of their pain and misery. Nothing comes without your own hard work, and no one is going to come and save you, it’s all on you.

Goenka describes this 10-day program as a 9-day surgery of the mind.

Let’s bust some myths and answer some common fears/questions:

1. Myth # 1: They take your phone away right when you arrive, and you’re cut off from the world. Not true at all! If you arrive at the suggested time frame, you’ll have plenty of time to wander the property, get acquainted with the place, meet some of the other incredible people who joined, and ease into it. Yes, this is some type of boot camp but in the most gracious way possible. No one throws you into the deep end on day one.
2. Myth #2: How can you survive without dinner? Haha, even if you’re not an experienced faster, firstly, there’s fruit, tea and coffee served at 5pm. Second, they ease you into that as well. The first day you arrive, there’s a delicious dinner served at 5pm. By the time you start the program the next day, you’re really not that hungry in the evening, trust me when I say this. And if you are, there’s fruit and ginger tea and all types of teas and coffees. Sometimes as humans, we get hungry just by the smell of food or cuz other people are eating nearby, or we’re scrolling IG or watching savory junk food TV ads, but none of that is happening here and no one is feasting around you. So this part becomes easy! One woman on our retreat couldn’t imagine a day without chicken or how she’d survive on a vegetarian diet for 10 days, and she said that it ended up being so easy.
3. Myth #3: It must be so strange not to talk to each other. Not really. Remember that everyone is doing the same thing, so you’ll get used to it. Plus, you learn the reason why. It’s actually nice not to make conversation for some time. This helps you observe the conversations in your own head. With too much chatter and noise from people, phones, social….you can’t tap into your own mind too well.
4. Myth #4: I don’t need ten days of silence; I can attend classes or just watch the lectures online and learn all this stuff. No. You won’t transform that way. Watching a class, or attending a lecture is wonderful! But you will internalize it on an intellectual level only. In order to tap into the subconscious mind, all chatter, even within your own mind, needs to be silenced. And that my friends can only be accomplished within such a container. Also, when you learn something intellectually, it often goes in one ear and out the other. A great teacher as we all know, will have her students experience a lesson, experience a story, to really get it and feel it. Right? Well, that’s what happens when you are here. You really experience the lessons, you see what it does to you so that you can internalize it in a way that will allow you to carry it on in your own life, past the retreat. Does it mean it’s a magic potion and after the 10 days you’re forever changed? No, you still need to practice this in a modified way. But does it mean you’re meditating 10 hours a day back at home? No, you’re not. Even a one-hour meditation once or twice a day can help you keep up this practice and make deeper and newer transformations. (I’ll admit I haven’t kept up with the mediations which is why I’m going back for a 3-day refresher course soon.)
5. Q #5: Is this religion affiliated, and will it contradict my religious beliefs? No, it’s not at all affiliated with any religion. Even though the ideology of this meditation stems from Buddha, this program and meditation style has nothing to do with Buddhism, Hinduism, Christianity, Judaism, Islam or any other religion. Why? They want it to be universal and open to everyone. If it’ll contradict your religion or not be aligned with what you were taught to believe, you’ll miss out on the opportunity and you’ll be excluded from this type of practice. So there is no religious affiliation at all. Personally, as a Jewish person, I was relieved to hear this because anything that contradicts the basis of Judaism or believes in idol worship of any kind, while I love to learn from others and open my mind, I can’t internalize it. My Jewish soul won’t allow it. When I realized that this is not religion based at all, I thought about how many of my Jewish friends can benefit from something like this. (You may even be able to bring your own food if you eat a Kosher diet, you’ll have to inquire about that from the location you’re attending. It’s probably discouraged and there might be some guidelines like not bringing food that they feel interfere with the meditation and don’t help you to do this deep work, but they may accommodate this if that’s the only way you can attend.)
6. Q #6: Is this really fully run by volunteers, how can this be? All this food, beautiful grounds? Yup, it is! Students get such great results from this in their lives that they come back to help other students achieve the same or donate if they can. Nothing is expected at all of new students. The only expectation is that you do your best to stay for the 10 days and follow the schedule to the best of your ability. In fact, you actually cannot help out until you’ve been through the full 10 days as a new student.
7. Myth #7: It must be really hard, what if I can’t do it? Although you’re silent, you’re not alone. There are teachers and guides and a whole team of people who are dedicated to helping you through it. Yes, you can talk to them when you need to and ask any questions, although it’s done in a quiet manner so as not to disturb the silence of others.
8. Q #8: How do you wake up without an alarm clock or phone? They provide an alarm clock in every room and a bell or gong is rung a few mins before every segment of the schedule, so you have a heads up, and yes, that bell also wakes you up at 4am. And you probably won’t be in a deep slumber either. You’ll likely be in a very peaceful and light sleep after all that mediation.
9. Q # 9: What if there’s an emergency with my family? You can give your family the centers number beforehand, and they’ll have a way to contact you. One of the women who I came with had to leave on day 7 due to a family emergency. I felt so bad for her cuz she made it so far and was determined to stay to the end.
10. Q #10: Is this only for self-growth junkies or can anyone do this? I’d say it’s for anyone, any gender, any age, and any person who wants to better themselves and live a happier, peaceful and more liberated life. Have better relationships, improve their earning capacity, get unstuck in different areas of their life. I think that everyone can do it! But with one caveat, if you are not open to learning, changing, growing, and you don’t come with an open mind, this won’t work for you. You gotta be willing to give this technique a try for the time that you’re there.

Here’s the schedule:

4:00am: Wake Up
4:30-6:30am: Meditate in hall or in your room
6:30-7:15am: Breakfast
7:15-8:00am: Break, shower, walk, free time
8:00-9:00am: Meditate in hall
9:10-11:00am: Mediate in hall or your room
11:00-11:45am: Lunch
11:45am-1:00pm: Break time
12:00-1:00pm: Speak with the teacher if you have any questions
1:00-2:15pm: Meditate in hall or in your room
2:30-3:30pm: Meditate in hall
3:30-5:00pm: Meditate in hall or in your room
5:00-5:30pm: Tea, fruit
5:30-6:00pm: Break time
6:00-7:00pm: Meditate in hall
7:00-7:15pm: Break
7:15-8:30pm: Discourse by Goenka in hall
8:30-9:00pm: Meditate in hall
9:00-10:00pm: Optional questions for teacher or sleep time
10:00pm: Lights out

Some tidbits on each day and some of my personal challenges:

Day 1: Felt super long and draggy! Gosh, sitting all day meditating and focusing on your breath and not letting your mind wander…this was harder than I thought. So I got smart, I said to myself, this probably felt so long cuz I got up at 4am. Let me try getting up a little later. And while I admit, I’m not proud of this, many days I slept till 5/5:30am and shortened my day by 1-1.5 hours. It just made the day much easier and less draggy. When I do this again, of course I’ll try to get up at 4am and do this 100% but this was my first time, and I gave it 90% and that was good enough for me.

Days 2-4: Some of these days my back hurt from sitting in one position for so long plus I felt super tired, even sleeping in till 5:30am, it’s tiring doing nothing all day and doing all this mind work. Plus, you can’t write, you can’t read books, you can’t journal. You’re showering, meditating, drinking coffee, eating food, walking around the property, meditating some more and listening to a fascinating discourse each night about how the mind operates and the reasoning behind all this. Why the nightly discourse? Cuz we can’t only learn thru our feelings and subconscious; a human has to make sense of all this too or they’ll be doubtful. And Goenka is a great teacher! And then you meditate some more:) Oh, so back to the tiredness, or tending to my aching back, how I dealt with this was that sometimes in the meditation times that you do in your own room, I would go for a few minute shut eye (on the floor of my room – so I’d be sure to be uncomfortable and wake up) or on my bed with lots of guilt cuz hey I came here to work hard and not take a nap! But again, I was doing my best. My back felt better, I got a boost of energy and truthfully, I didn’t have these challenges as much towards the middle/end of the program.

Day 4: This was by far my hardest night! Till now, it felt kinda easy. Yeh, it was hard to get up at 4 or 5am, yes, sometimes my back hurt, and it was hard to not let my mind wander and focus so much on my breath. But suddenly they introduced a new way of meditating and some new rules and regulations to follow in some of the meditation practices. And I personally found this very hard. In my mind, I called those hours the torture chamber of the body and mind. Okay, okay, I’m exaggerating it’s not so bad, but when I first learned about this just as I was coasting thru the program and not expecting more hard work, it took me by surprise and I even had some tears in the meditation room that night thinking man, how am I gona get thru this! But again, you’re not doing this alone; if you’re struggling with this, so is everyone else, and you’re all doing your best. And that’s all you can expect from yourself, to give it your all and do your best. No one is holding an iron clad over you saying if you violate this rule you’re expelled. No! But this program is very humbling cuz you’re witnessing so many volunteers investing their precious time to ensure your success that it makes you wana give it your all and do your best! (That’s part of the psychology of this no charge thing which you’ll learn if you choose to go.)

Day 5: I made a mental calculation after yesterday’s hard evening: I counted the amount of “torture chambers” left (yes, exaggerating again but basically the number of hours left thru day 10 of the hardest meditations of the day) and figured, I’ve got 18 left, if I can just make it thru 3 of these a day, I’m good. And the countdown began! And every day, when I got thru another 3, I felt an achievement, whether I did it perfectly or not, it was an accomplishment, and I was proud of myself for trying my best.

Funny tidbit: I’ll never forget, day 4 or 5, as I was on one of my many daily walks during a break, I looked up at a plane flying overhead (you know how you watch on shows like survivor where they wonder – will anyone ever find me here? lol) Yes, that’s how I felt on those days and longed for when I’ll be on a plane again doing ordinary things. That experience repeated itself on day 8 but in a very different way.

Day 8: When I looked up at a passing plane that day, something had transformed. I thought to myself, wow, how lucky am I to be able to do this and learn this technique and work on my thoughts and mind while other people are just going about their regular. I felt extremely blessed and grateful. Cuz no pain, no gain. When you go thru hard things, you come thru it much better, stronger and with more gratitude, wisdom, awareness and appreciation. While the physical aspects are great, you’ll be working hard! This is no picnic but is so worth it.

Some of my favorite moments:

Day 8 evening: As we watched the discourse, I heard something that was music to my ears! The teacher said, you have two days left, but really just one day to work. The last day, day 10 will be the healing, integration day where you’ll be able to talk to everyone else and acclimate to going back into the world without a shock. My first thought – that means the torture chamber aint happening on day 10, omg, 3 less to go! I don’t know what I was more excited about, chatting with everyone, getting my phone back and checking in with the family (although I didn’t really miss the phone one bit!!!) or having less of those hard meditations. I was so excited! Only one hard day left, not two! Suddenly everything felt lighter. Now don’t get me wrong, most of the day was so enjoyable, rewarding and not that hard. But some moments were difficult like when you were asked to observe physical pain (from sitting so long) and not move or react. But all this is to teach you how to integrate this in other triggering situations in your life and be able to calmly observe hard things around you without a reaction. (Even something as simple as a loud motorcycle or grass blower in daily life, for sensitive folks like me, that loud noise can feel super triggering, like a rude shock to the body). So the program is planned with this in mind and the idea is, if you don’t experience some discomfort doing this, how will you learn to surpass the discomforts that comes up daily and keep it from affecting you?

Day 10-11am: Seriously the best 24 hours of the retreat! As soon as we got the go ahead to chat with each other, it was nonstop chatter in the girls dormitory! Getting to know one another, sharing experiences, sharing the reasons why we came. Suddenly the people I’ve been observing, watching, seeing them take their daily walks or hikes, watching them eat (although we weren’t supposed to look lol) were more than just an image I observed, they were a whole person with a story, amazing personality and wonderful intentions. We enjoyed each other so much that we started a WA chat the last morning so we can keep in touch with one another. I can’t say we stayed very good at it but occasionally someone pipes in to see how we’re all keeping up with the meditations.

All in all, my favorite times of day were watching the sunrise, the beautiful moon, and most definitely lunchtime and sleep! Being able to rest and go to sleep after so much mind work, was such a treat!!! Just letting my mind rest, wander, and not focus on breath or any of the mindfulness practices felt like vacation! And of course, mealtime was wonderful. I actually didn’t expect to enjoy it so much. Afterall, you’re not paying for any of it, so how good can the food be? But the food blew me away from the first night. They use the most intentional healthy ingredients and create yummy and tasty meals made with so much love; you can literally feel it in the food. The eating area was organized so well, with so many options and healthy choices, from a salad bar to all sorts of coffees and teas, filtered water, hot water, various breakfast options from jams to various nut butters and healthy omega-3 seeds; even acv, detox spices and vitamins incase you felt like you needed an immune boost. The whole program from start to finish was organized down to the last detail to ensure your comfort and success. You can view some photos below and videos on my IG @renewbyrivkie, in Vipassana highlights.

Accommodations:

I chose to do my first experience in Kauffman, Texas because I heard that they have private rooms. That was important to me, especially if you can’t talk to your roommates, that would probably feel awkward. And what I didn’t realize before, is that the private room would end up being a great comfort and respite when I needed that extra sleep or 15-20 min nap during a meditation period. Each room was equipped with a table, chair, comfy bed, shelves, closet, sink, toilet and shower. It’s immaculately clean (at least in the girl’s dormitory) and kept up so well, with mindfulness and love in every detail. And yes, men and women are separate. There’s a girl’s dorm and boys’ dorm and you cannot walk on each other’s sides of the property so that you won’t be distracted. Only the first day and last day you can mingle. The men eat in a different dining hall too and the only thing you share is the same meditation hall, men on one side, women on another, with assigned seating which you get on the first day for the meditation room and dining hall, which actually makes things so much easier. No decisions to think about at mealtime or meditation time.

Vipassana retreats are held all over the US and in most countries and many are equipped with all the comforts you’ll need. Some have private rooms, some don’t. Some are held in an official Vipassana center and some locations rent out space. I recommend going to an official Vipassana center if you can because that will likely be set up in a way that you will get the most of every detail. I also highly recommend the one I was at in Kauffman. Another great property I heard about is in North Fork, CA and in MA. People say these 3 properties are the best in the US. There’s also a great one in Palm Springs. Although, I applied the entire fall of 2023 to all the CA ones and couldn’t get in to any. It’s worse than applying for college or Jewish camps!!! They fill up in 30 seconds from when they open, and you’re immediately put on a wait list. So, when I got the acceptance from Kauffman, TX (while I was on a train traveling in Austria in December) I was thrilled and confirmed right away.

Actually, looking back, I love the time of year that I chose to do this. The start of Spring. Spring is a time of renewal, cleaning out the old, bringing in the new and there’s no better time to do this, especially before Pesach, the holiday of perfecting oneself both physically and spiritually.

My intention is to do this once a year (hopefully at the start of Spring), and / or volunteer once or twice a year, whether it’s for a full 10 days or just 2-3 days in the kitchen. Y’all know I love the kitchen… in fact, I asked if I can get a copy of all their recipes before I left and they were so sweet and said yes. They served many Indian dishes that I had never tried before that were phenomenal.

In fact, writing is not encouraged during the program, unless you have a question for the manager and need to write it. I was so blown away by the food that on day three, I wrote down the names of different dishes that I want to make when I get back home like Poha, Idli, Tofu steak, Lasagna, Cilantro chutney, Upma, Kheer, Potato curry, Roasted eggplant etc. Oy, that was cheating but I needed a place to dump those food thoughts. It was actually a very enlightening lesson to see how much my mind thinks of food and dishes I wana make and trips I wana go on, and this realization gave me an opportunity to work on it. These are things you wouldn’t realize without utter silence, and even with utter silence it took me days to become aware of some of this.

What transformations have I experienced since the retreat:

For a few months after the retreat, I’ve noticed how much more present I had become and also how much less ruffled I would get by things that would normally affect me more. I’ve noticed another level of calmness, trust in the universe, peace and presence of mind and it’s been quite fun to observe and be more in control of my reactions and thoughts. I’m heading back to the retreat this winter because truthfully, I haven’t nurtured this enough over the last few months as I was focused on other things; and while the retreat plants a seed of change, it needs to be nurtured. Sometimes life gets in the way of that but it’s never too late to start again. And for 2nd time students, getting in is much easier than 1st time students and there are many more options: 3-day shorter programs, 1-day refreshers, 30–45-day programs, etc.

If you got this far, I want to encourage you to give this program a chance!

Don’t’ worry about getting thru the 10 days, just take one day at a time. You’ll be so well taken care of, so you can focus completely on yourself, healing your mind, untangling yourself from the things that keep you stuck, developing awareness for things you don’t even know you’re stuck in or why; and most importantly, do this for all those you love! You’ll uplevel yourself and your life and you’ll become part of the Vipassana tribe which in my opinion is the best tribe to be part of (other than our Jewish tribe of course;). These are people devoted to self-development, self-growth and becoming more evolved so they can bring more light and peace into their own life and into the world around them.

Feel free to reach out with any questions or check out more on their website by clicking here.

With love,
Rivkie:)

ps: This was first written in April 2024, on a flight to Israel, shortly after I arrived back from this experience, but I never had a chance to publish it until now…9 months later…cuz life has been busy and a whirlwind of so many changes. Which I guess is kinda what you want after an experience like this. Maybe the retreat helped inspire some of that or push me to move forward in ways I’d already known I needed. I surely got a lot from it and I know you will too!